If Fate Were Kind to Severus
by Leah095
Summary: If fate were kind to Severus many occurrences in his life wouldn't have happened. The love of his life would never have left him, he wouldn't feel less like a man, and of course Death Eater he wouldn't be. But then again when was fate every kind. REVIEW!


Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I did own Harry Potter the world would be a better place.

AU: Okay this story contains a bit of slash and any comments that flame about it will be deleted and i will call your ass out. I got this spark of inspiration walking in the kitchen putting up groceries. My mother was muttering about how I hated to do physical labor, even though I do most of it in the house, and if I had been born a boy it would have been different. So I thought "if fate had been so kind"… That did it. I was already on a James/Severus high anyways and after A Winter's Day Monologue and Madan Der Freischutz I couldn't help it. So here it is. (MONTH LATER)

OMG! I've been procrastinating! I got my stuff jacked and all of this other crap. Thank gosh for swine flu or I wouldn't have looked at this story for some time. ANTIWAY! I'm gonna finish this.

* * *

If fate were kind to Severus his father's get rich scheme would have worked out and he and his mother would be living in the life of luxury his mother had experienced in childhood. His father's plan failed miserable depleting their already depleted funds. The idea was that he was to start a business with one of his mutual friends that would provide insurance and other social services to the community, like elderly homes or nursemaid for example (or use your imagination). Eileen had been wary had first but reassured when Tobias told her of his partners education , which he himself would have gotten if he hadn't dropped out to take care of her and Severus, but also his own knowledge of the subject. When the place was up and running Tobias was stricken with illness. His business partners assured him that he'd run the business while he was out. Everything was seemingly going downhill based on the man's reports until one day the newspaper ran an article about a business venture going down between his partner and another major company. This company was going to buy the smaller one and run it itself. The money the man got was enough for him to be rolling in dough and the money from the actual business was a pretty sum. When Tobias confronted the man he was shown documents that stated the other man had rights to the business and Tobias had none. Knowing that he was going to lose in any sort of battle against the man he went home. Tobias was brave but not a complete fool.

Eileen was furious on the outside but on the inside she was more furious and still sad. She had faith in Tobias and had hoped it would have all worked out. They all had hoped it would have worked out, but fate be so cruel it did not. Little Severus (Gosh that's weird to call him that) stood silently next to his father who took a long swig of his rum. He was in one of his stupors that were alcohol induced and most likely wouldn't even notice Severus standing there with a look of sadness that would break even the coldest of hearts. He was hungry and cold and showing signs of a fever. The heat and the rest of the electricity had been turned off early that week. His mother was out looking to find a job or digging in the garbage for dinner. He pondered where his father had gotten the money for the rum but thought it better not to ask. He turned away from his dad and sat down in the barren kitchen waiting for his mother to come home.

When she made it into the house she was furious. She had been working all day yesterday to gather enough money for Tobias to buy the family a decent meal of some sort. Apparently when she left to work again Tobias had bought 3 bottles of rum instead. Tobias was lounging on the couch looking at her while Severus watched the scene in fear. He was worried about his mother. Tobias was a mean drunk but never really hit either of them. He threw a fit and broke things but he was still afraid this might be the breaking point.

"YOU IDIOT! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!" Eileen fumed. She grabbed a vase and flung it at Tobias. It just barely reached over his head.

"What the hell is your problem?" He questioned. He was glaring at his wife as she walked up to him. She pushed him roughly on the shoulders.

"WHAT'S MY PROBLEM?! I GO TO WORK AND YOU STAY YOUR LAZY ASS HOME! ALL I ASKED OF YOU WAS TO GO GET SOME GROCERIES SO THAT SEVERUS COULD HAVE A DECENT MEAL, BUT INSTEAD YOU GO OUT AND BUY RUM AND GET DRUNK ON THE COUCH!" Her face was red and she was pushing Tobias roughly. Severus had been hoping that today would have been quiet and peaceful, but fate be so cruel.

"WELL EILEEN I'M HAVING A HARD TIME! ALL YOU DO IS COMPLAIN! HAVE SOME SYMPATHY WILL YOU?!"

"SYMPATHY?! You want me to give you sympathy. I can't you bastard when you're taking food out of our son's mouth!" Her eyes were brimming with tears. She was emotionally and physically exhausted by their fights. She had come home in the silly hope that he had done what she had asked of him. Something so simple. She frowned. Tobias never did what she asked. Everything he did he did for Tobias. She and Severus were unimportant. She smiled bitterly thinking about how her mother was right. She should have just left Tobias in the beginning and she would be living her life in riches. She attentively looked at Severus sitting on the floor with his hands around his knees. She took it back. If she had left Tobias she wouldn't have gotten her precious angel. Her attention refocused on Tobias when he slammed the back of his hand to her cheek. She stumbled back a bit and blinked up at him. His hands were clinched in a fist next to him and he was breathing heavily. Her cheek was red and the tears rolling down did nothing to help the stinging.

Severus stared wide eyed at his father. He couldn't believe he had actually hit his mother and by the look she had on her face neither did she. Severus ran up in front of his mother as his father approached her. He spread out his arms blocking her from view. His father scowled. He pushed Severus out of the way and sent out another slap to Eileen's face. She hissed as he beat her brutally and begged for him to stop. Severus in one last heroic feat lunged at Tobias but did nothing to deter him. Tobias turned and glared. He kicked Severus hard in the rib-cage sending the boy to the floor. He couldn't breathe anymore and the next kick directed at his stomach made it worse. He lurched as his stomach retched to deposit its contents on the floor. Nothing came out except a bit of drool seeing as though Severus hadn't eaten in the last two days. Eileen crawled over to the coffee table and grabbed her wand she pointed it towards Tobias. Sending out a jinx he wobbled to the ground and swore. Eileen picked Severus up and ran to the room she shared with Tobias and locked the door behind them. She sat down on the floor with Severus wrapped inside of her arms. She cooed silently to him as he cried and healed his injuries. She rocked the boy against her back and forth. Severus cried harder until his sobs choked him and forced him to take in an uncomfortable breath that came out with a slight hiss. His mother held onto him as his father swore at her to remove the jinx. She muttered something and the sounds of his father were silenced. He slept soundly against his mother until the morning when she yelled at Tobias and kicked him out of the house.

* * *

If fate were kind to Severus he would have been born a squib. A few years after where we left off the Snape family was sitting down at the table with their measly scrap of food for breakfast. Tobias had apologized to Eileen and had recently given up drinking. His son was his priority now and he needed a better job. Now that Severus was going to Hogwarts they needed more money than they had. His mother had gotten a stable job as a seamstress. This handled the problem of getting his robes fitted and gave them some sort of income to be enough for Severus to be sent there. However it wasn't enough for them to survive on while Severus was gone. The family sat silently to prepare for the trip to Diagon Alley. When they had finished breakfast they apparated to a point in London close near the Leaky Cauldron. Diagon Alley was bustling with people and it was hard to distinguish one face from another. That was until he spotted Lily. He was shocked to say the least. A muggle roaming around Diagon Alley? He looked up at his mother who was bargaining with a man to lower the price of a book she needed for Severus. He dashed off and caught Lily by the arm. She whipped her head around and then realized who he was. She smiled sweetly. Severus had grown to love Lily. She was sweet and didn't make fun of him like all the other kids at school. They lived near each other and often would go walking around Spinner's End with Petunia. Severus smiled at her. She giggled and he paled. Did he look stupid? Why was she laughing at him? She reached out and whipped his cheek. He blushed noticeably and stuttered out the question of why she had done that. Lily showed him the smug on her finger. He must have gotten his face dirty. It wasn't uncommon thing, seeing that he rarely bathed, but it was an embarrassing one.

Severus and Lily traveled through Diagon Alley without their parents who were busy shopping for them. Petunia had had a fit when Lily got her letter and was staying at home with her mother instead of in the shops with Lily. The duo visited a Madame Malkin's where Lily had come to pick up her robes. Walking inside they spotted a boy with messy raven hair and glasses. He spotted Lily and smiled brightly but frowned once he saw Severus. He was used to people frowning by now and this boy was no different from all the others who did so. Assuming he was daft and poor. The poor part was true but the daft part was far off the mark. The boy sauntered over to Lily and extended his hand.

"James Potter," He said coolly. Severus almost scoffed but kept quiet. He was desperately trying to get Lily's attention.

"Lily Evans," She said sweetly. She noticed that Severus hadn't said anything so she introduced him. "And this is Severus!" She smiled saying his name making Severus's heart thump. James scowled but nodded anyway. James called to his parents telling them that he'd be back in a little bit and they gave him their approval.

Severus was miserable. Lily seemed to be becoming fond of James and it was getting on his nerves. He told her all about Hogwarts and the various different houses, information that Severus had given her earlier, and acted as though it was astounding and new information. Severus was furious on the inside but calm on the outside alibi the scowl that appeared every so often. When the time came for the two of them to go meet with their parents Severus jumped at the chance to get Lily away from James. He hustled her away and Lily smiled and gave a wave to James who was smiling even bigger than before. Lily sighed and told her father about James and spoke as though she had a crush on him. Severus laughed in denial. She couldn't like him. He was cocky and arrogant and indifferent to Severus. That right there should have been the deciding factor. I mean he was her best-friend and if you weren't going to try at being friendly with him then forget it. Lily's father nodded and laughed in delight. He asked Lily if she was fond of the boy causing her to blush and nod her head. Severus's heart fell. Fate had always found a way to bite Sev in the ass and this was just one of those moments.

On the boat towards Hogwarts he met a few people. Narcissa Black and her cousin were opposites. She was blonde he was a raven, she was thoughtful and soft while he was brash and coarse, and she was kind to Severus he was less than so. From the beginning he looked down on Severus and made it his duty upon seeing him to make his life hell. Although he was obviously poorer than she was Narcissa was interested in him and that meant that Lucius was as well. The boy was also blonde but did not have the soft spoken attitude that Narcissa possessed. He was arrogant and bossy but was somewhat pleasant conversation seeing as that he was wary of saying something to anger Narcissa.

The other boys on the boat included James, a boy named Remus, and a mousy boy named Peter. They had all attached themselves to Sirius ignoring Narcissa taunting about them being Gryffindors while Sirius was a Slytherin. Lily was smiling and laughing along with the boys seeing as that Narcissa didn't like her that much. Narcissa found her arrogant and a know it all and yet knowing nothing about the world they lived in. She assumed it was because she was muggle-born and sighed. Severus looked at the scene before him. A small boat full of Slytherins and obvious Gryffindors. They acted kinder and more civil than expected. Fate was the bitch it was yet again and Sirius opened his fat mouth. He and Narcissa had been talking quietly when Sirius interrupted. Severus had made a comment that had sounded snide to Sirius and he, being the idiot he was, saw it as an insult to himself and found it necessary to say something to Severus. This escalated into a full out argument with James backing up Sirius, Lucius backing up Severus, and Narcissa, Remus and Peter watching silently. Lily however was conflicted and when James finally said something about Severus being poor it was the final straw. She yelled at James at the top of her lungs and when the boat made it to shore she grabbed Severus by the arm and stormed away with him. Severus looked back at them and smirked. That was until James sent out a jinx that made his pants fall down and him trip and fall into the mud on the bank. Everyone laughed except for Severus's new found friends and Remus who glared at James and helped Severus up. Fate was not kind to Severus so this wasn't the end of it. It was the beginning of much more terrible and embarrassing situations involving the four boys.

* * *

If fate were kind to Severus the next few things wouldn't have been so. He, for one, would be passing potions with the highest marks. Sadly for him Slughorn prefers two of the four boys that make his life hell. Remus and James were Slughorn's favorite and Severus least so. He always did better than them at every potion but he got graded differently. Unfairly. Remus pities him for it but James found it as something to shove in Severus's face at every turn. If fate were kind to Severus the second thing wouldn't have happened. It was the summer and after a harsh 5th year he went home miserable. The Marauders had been extremely unfair and cruel to him this year. He had accidently called Lilly a mudblood and she refused to talk or acknowledge him anymore. James sought the opportunity to ask her out and without any guilt stopping her she said yes. And worse yet his mother had recently been laid off meaning the family had less income. He worried he might not be able to go to Hogwarts this year and if he did he'd be starving his family. He made it up stairs to his room and first dusted off his mirror after taking a quick shower. His bathing habits have improved and for the most part his hair wasn't greasy. He ran his hand threw his raven locks and smiled. It had grown long over the last couple of months and now made slight curls. It was wavy and thick and made his face look less pointed and his nose less hooked. His lips were full and red and while looking in the mirror he remembered something. He frowned slightly and ran downstairs to grab the old newspapers his father would take out of the garbage. To be better informed, he'd say. He looked down to the wanted section and found what he was looking for. He sighed and nodded to himself. Staring back up at him was an article in the paper for a waiter at a club down town. Problem was this club was a strip joint slash whore house. He knew these kind of places paid good money and his family was in desperate need. If that meant serving drinks to perverted old men then so be it. It said pay and hours would be negotiated at interview meaning it left an opportunity for Severus to work while his parents were out or asleep.

He went to the club as soon as he was sure that his parents were asleep. They didn't need to know where he was going and if he got the job where the money was coming from. He made it to the club after a long walk. It wasn't opened yet but the door was opened. He went inside and looked around. Various people were walking around in different outfits. The bartender was cleaning off the table and a couple of the boys and girls where practicing whatever routine that they were performing. A boy walked over to Severus and glared. He was tanned with light brown hair and dark blue eyes. He was thin and wore a shirt that said "TOP BITCH". His expression was hostile and Severus gulped. The man looked him over and opened his mouth to speak.

"What are you doing here kid? The place is closed if you didn't read the sign."

"I came here to apply for the waiter job. I'm really coordinated and…" The man cut him off.

"Coordination isn't what we are looking for." He stared at him intently. The man cupped Severus's face in his hand and turned his head for side to side. He ran his thumb over his lips and Severus blushed. He was happy that the club was still too dark for the man to see him. He scoffed and called out for a "Katie". An older woman came up to them and smiled. It wasn't pleasant at all and took Severus all his might not to leave. His heart was pumping fast and he was nervous as hell.

"My, my Thomas. What a beautiful boy. Friend of yours?" She asked looking Severus over. He was getting tired of people doing that but said nothing in fear that the woman and her long nails would gut him.

"No. Just some punk who wants to have the waiter job."

"Well give it to him!"She gasped in fake shock. Thomas looked at her and sneered.

"This kid got to be what thirteen." He admonished.

"I'm fifteen." Severus spoke. Thomas scowled and pointed at him and looked at the woman meaningfully. She seemed to ponder for a moment and finally nodded.

"True…. But that doesn't mean we can't lie? Let him work a bit and we'll see how it goes. Go help him dress up okay Jay." The man scowled at the name. He roughly pulled Severus aside and brought him into the dressing room. All around him were half- naked men and woman. The ones who weren't were all dressed in obscene and scandalous clothing. He blushed which caused someone to shot out "virgin" making the others laugh. He blushed even more. He had no clue why he was so nervous. He had never been nervous like this before. Then again he had never been in a strip club either. Thomas shooed all of them out which was greeted with moans and replies of you're the boss. Thomas went into the bathroom and turned on the shower throwing a naked Severus in. He had no idea when the man had gotten him so and blushed again. Thomas glared and grabbed some shampoo and began working it into his hair.

"I can't believe she got some pre-pubescent little punk. What is she trying to do? Replace me?" He grumbled. Severus was brave enough to speak up.

"Why does she call you Jay?" He asked quietly. It was the first thing that came to his mind. Thomas looked at him sharply.

"Jay, as in Jay Bird, is my stage name 'cause the color of my eyes are blue. We'll have to get you one I'm guessing." He rinsed the shampoo and grabbed a bottle of shaving cream and a razor. Severus jumped at first but relaxed when Thomas told him he wasn't going to hurt the boy. He had no clue why he was suddenly so trusting of the man. After shaving Severus's legs Thomas threw him a towel and led him back into the dressing room. Severus rubbed his hair to dry it as Thomas got a blow-dryer to help him out. After that was done Thomas combed out all the knots and set up a curling iron.

"You already have wavy hair. Let's just help it out a bit." He said to Severus. Sev nodded.

"My names Severus." Severus muttered quietly.

"That's a weird name." Sev nodded in agreement.

"So what do you do around here?"

"Job wise?" Thomas asked and received a nod. "I strip, serve drinks from time to time, and I blow whatever bloke pays the highest." He said it nonchalantly. Severus gave him a worried look. More for himself than for Thomas.

"Don't worry about it. You don't have to do that. All you do is serve their gin and look pretty doing it. And if you are lucky you get to help the head bitch, moi, do his bidding." Severus glared sharply. Thomas had him dressed in a mini skirt with frills at the bottom that just barely covered his arse. He had on a pair of boxer-briefs under it and long-socks that reached mid thigh. A pair of heels adorned his feet. They were somewhat high but he was able to keep his balance. He looked foolish in his eyes but Thomas gave him an approving nod. Thomas left to shower and get dressed.

"Oh and Severus, call everyone by their stripper names. You could be," Thomas stopped to think then continued, "Temple. Since you have wavy hair like Shirley Temple. Or your bodies a temple. I don't know. Can't think of anything better." Severus left the room and was greeted by noise and smells. The place reeked of cigarettes, sweat, sex, and of course the large helping of shame. He walked over to the bar where the bartender told him to just go out and see if someone wanted a drink. He saw a middle-age man looking at the woman and men pass him by. Sev took a deep breath and walked.

"Would you like a drink?" Sev said coarsely. The man raised an eyebrow at him.

"That's no way to convince someone to buy a drink. Run along and play little brat." Sev scowled fiercely. A woman dressed in a similar outfit as Severus, her's was blue his was black and she had ribbons in her hair, walked up. She shushed him with a finger before he said anything and got the man's attention. She sat down on his lap and leaned up against him.

"I'm sorry honey," she said sugar sweet into his ear. "He's new and I'm guessing kind of nervous. It'd be great if you made him feel comfortable and buy a drink. Make him feel like he did a good job." She pouted at him. He smiled and nodded.

"Get me a Corona!" He shouted to Severus over the loud music that began to play. He nodded and smiled sweetly after a discrete look from the girl. He walked to the bartender to ordered the man's drink and walked back. The man was touching the woman and she giggled quietly. He put the drink down on the table and the man gave handed him money. He made a reach for it but the man pulled away with a smile. Severus gave him a puzzled look and noticed the woman playing with her garter. He didn't understand why she was doing that. Maybe she was trying to act sexy for the man. It hit him like a ton of bricks. He blushed and the man scowled. She gave him a stern look and he picked up his skirt a bit and got closer. He slipped the wad of cash inside of the garter and gave Sev a smack on his arse. He squeaked indignantly and quickly ran away. He pondered hexing the man but thought better. This was an embarrassing job but his family needed it. His parents had been out of food for the last week and he couldn't' let them starve. This was the only job that would think of employing him, a teenager with no other job skills.

It was nearing the end of his and everyone else's' shift and he had just seen Thomas, no Jay, perform and it was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. He was graceful and had a kind smile the entire time and was an excellent dancer. Sev wondered how he could look like such an angel on stage and be sort of a prick in real life. Jay was wearing a pair of leather pants that were obviously to small and a tank top that didn't cover his stomach. It was simple as outfits in this club were but it did the job. He smiled and flirted with all the patrons and received most of the attention, much to the others disdain, until he spotted a young man, 20ish, who was staring wide-eyed and opened mouth at him. He walked over and leaned against the table. The man was obviously flustered and blushed and stuttered while he talked to Jay. Jay whispered something in his ear and he nodded dumbly. Jay led him away to a room on the other side or the club. Sev turned to the bartender who had just given him apple juice, refusing him anything else.

"Where is he going?" He asked him. The bartender looked up from the glass he had been cleaning. Kevin, the bartender smiled.

"One of the private rooms." Sev looked dumbfounded.

"What do you do in the private room?" He asked innocently. He truly didn't know. Kevin raised an eyebrow and gave a sneaky grin. Severus gave him another puzzled look and then realization dawned on him. He blushed and shook his head to remove the thought. Kevin gave a laughed out virgin and continued to clean the glasses. Sev glared at him. Katie walked into the room as the last of the guest where leaving. She gave him a wide and toothy grin. She reminded him of fox the way her smile was always sly. Jay walked towards the bar about a half an hour later and sat on the stool. Many of the other dancers were leaving but a couple of them were hanging around. Katie told them he wanted them out by 4 and left. Kevin glared at her but said nothing. He grabbed a bottle of rum and a coke from the bar and sat it down on the table with a glass. He handed Sev an envelope with £100. He had made around on 50 pounds more that night but it didn't matter. Katie took money like all strip club owners do. At least he had enough to buy groceries for his family.

Sev looked around at the people who stayed. Jay and a few other people were sitting down. Two women and one man and of course Kevin. He noticed one of the women was the one who had helped him out earlier. She looked different. She didn't have any make-up on and her hair was in ringlets spread out sporadically on her head. It looked much shorter that way but gave her a childish appearance. Her hair was chestnut and her eyes amber. The other woman was black with long hair that reached her mid-back. It was in a ponytail with a bit that swept in her eyes. Her eyes were reddish in color and he assumed they were brown or something. The other man was slim with black hair with blue tips. It was short and had small curls here and there. They all turned to look at him. The woman gave him a warm smile and the man gave him a lecherous grin. He threw his arm around his shoulder and smiled.

"I'm Chris! But you, my young hot friend, can call me Baby. Or Suga' Daddy. Whatever floats your boat!" The two women glared at him. They stood up and smacked him hard on the side of his head. He winced and complained about how much it hurt. Thomas sat next to where he was standing at the bar. Kevin gave him a sneaky smile and walked away.

"That's Chris as you heard. The red eyed bitch is Carmen and the other is Sarah." He said pointing to each of the woman. Carmen stuck out her tongue and waved to Sev. Sarah smiled and shook his hand. The group had all been friends since high school when they all started to work here. Carmen was in college and Sarah was working on her degree. Chris was still lost in life and was attempting to one day make it as a Broadway star. A very American dream of a half-American boy with an all American accent. He talked to them for what felt like hours. He had lost track of time when he suddenly realized he had to go home.

"What time is it?" He asked slightly panicked. The other checked their watches.

"3 o'clock." Sarah said.

"Why what's wrong?" Carmen asked.

"My dad goes to work at 4 o'clock and leaves the house around 3:30. I really need to get home."

"Don't you ride a bike?" Kevin commented. He nodded. The women shook their heads. They weren't going to let him go home by himself at this hour in this part of town on a bike. Chris offered to drive him home and received a chilling no. They looked at Thomas expectantly and he nodded. He got up and grabbed his jacket. Severus followed behind. They got into Thomas's car and drove away. The drive was quiet until Thomas broke the silence.

"How was your first day kid?" He asked sincerely.

"It was fine. I got groped a bit but I guess that's to be expected." He muttered. He snuck further into the coat that Thomas had given him from the back seat after his teeth began to chatter. It was warm and furry and provided a lot more comfort than his own. Thomas smiled at him.

"Yeah your right." He turned to Severus once they got outside his house. "Is this your place?" He asked sadly.

"Yeah. It's not as bad as it looks." Thomas nodded. Before he could get out of the car Thomas grabbed his arm. He pulled Severus close to him and kissed him on the lips. Thomas's lips were soft and fit perfectly against Severus's full ones. He moaned out and wrapped his hands in Thomas's hair. He had just met him but it felt so right. He whimpered when Thomas started to pull away. For one split second their mouths parted as Severus shifted onto Thomas's lap. God was he horny. Thomas began pulling him away. Severus's lips were swollen. Thomas stroked the side of his face and grinned. He ran his fingers through his hair.

"If you need anything call me. Promise?" He said handing Severus a piece of paper.

"Promise," Severus responded out of breath. He got out of the car and waved goodbye. Thomas's made sure he got into the house before driving away.

When he made it inside he was greeted by a harsh smack to the face. He stumbled back a bit and focused on where it had come from. His mother was glaring at him a crying silently. His father was sitting down on the couch silently watching the scene. Sev glared at the both of them and began to his room. He stopped and turned around to set the money on the table. He ran down the hall and slammed his door. His mother gasped and sobbed harder and louder. His father stomped to his room and flung open the door. Sev lay on his bed looking up at the ceiling refusing to look at his father.

"Where the hell have you been and where did you get that money?" His father boomed.

"Working," He replied meekly. His face was however cold.

"And what work are you doing exactly?"

"None of your business okay."

"NONE OF MY BUSINESS?! I'M YOUR FATHER OF COURSE IT'S MY BUSINESS!"

"Look I haven't been selling drugs or whoring myself out okay. Don't worry. It's safe." He spoke honestly. It was fairly safe and he wasn't doing any of the things he listed. His father calmed down slightly.

"If you're safe then why won't you tell me?" Severus sighed.

"Look Father, it doesn't matter. I have friends who'll take me home and watch out for me okay. That's all that matters." Tobias had never been a part of Severus's life that much and didn't think it was his place. He was never much of a father the first eleven years and the last four Sev has been gone so much that the couple of months didn't matter. He checked his watch and went out the door. He talked silently with Eileen who was sobbing still. He told her not to worry, that Severus was too much of a Slytherin to put himself in danger. He went to work knowing that whatever his son did it wasn't dangerous or stupid.

Thomas became Tom and he had grown to love his friends. The work was hard and many a time had he been harassed but the bodyguard, Smith, was protective and would kick, whoever gave Sev a hard time, out. And Thomas and the others would send such an icy glare that the man would whimper and leave Severus alone. Tom took care of Severus. He'd buy him things that he thought he would like. Like clothes and hair products. That was actually more because he didn't want to always wash Severus's hair , although he did like to see him naked. He was cold to him and the rest of his friends at the bar but still friendly. He opened up a bit to Severus however. The made out as often as they could but never proceeded to anything than him giving Sev a blow job. Tom never asked anything in return but a kiss and a smile. He was sweet in his own way. It was nearing the end of the summer and it was his last day on the job. The club was closing down and Smith, Kevin, Carmen, Sarah, and Thomas were giving him a farewell. He knew Thomas cared about him but it wasn't love. It was a platonic relationship with perks. He loved Tom just not in the sense that he wished they'd get married one day. Everyone was hugging Severus and giving him gifts mostly consisting of clothes, hair products, and books. Everyone kissed him goodbye. Thomas was leaning on the bar and called him over. He handed Severus a parcel and when he looked inside he was shocked to say the least. Staring up at him was a remembrel. He stared up at Thomas for what seemed like hours. Tom leaned in and kissed Severus on the lips. The pulled him closer and grasped onto the back of his neck. Sev moaned and pulled back. Tom was a couple of inches away from his face.

"I could always tell," Tom whispered and leaned back. The kissing stopped and Tom took Severus home where they said their final goodbyes. The next couple of days involved Hogwarts shopping. Severus had a lot of extra money and his parents saved it in his own account at Gringotts. Severus was actually happy the last few days he spent with his parents. It wasn't filled with arguments like it usually was. It was peaceful. His parents had asked about his clothes a couple of times and he only replied with boyfriend. It was a dumb move on his part but his parents were to stunned to further the matter. When he got on the train to Hogwarts it wasn't peaceful because life wasn't easy or nice to Severus.

* * *

If Fate were kind to Severus he would have still maintained his greasy appearance and had the smarts not to pack any of the clothes he had received over the summer. It was a dipshit move on his part. Right when he got on the train he received stares from both sexes. Lucuis gawked at him and Narcissa cooed and ruffled his hair. She fawned over him the entire time. He was getting annoyed. The Marauders had just bothered him with snide comments about him trying to fit in or something. He wasn't really paying much attention seeing as though someone had groped his arse a couple of seconds after the conversation began. The showers were worse. Every time he got out of the bathroom they bothered him in some way. The catcalls the whispers and giggles. He wanted to scream. That is until he got a boyfriend.

Charles was a Ravenclaw seventh-year who played quidditch as the Ravenclaw beater. He was kind and would coddle and pamper Severus all the time. Sort of like how Tom would just have to buy something for him out of whim. But instead of out of whim it was as an apology. Charles would cheat on Severus often and give him a sincere apology and cry begging him to come back. Severus would take him back and then something else would happen. Charles was extremely jealous and somewhat abusive. He hit Severus a couple of times but never severely injured him. As fate would have it Severus woke up one morning in a bed that was not his in a room that was not his and in a house that was not his. He shot up quickly and looked around at the red curtains and almost screamed. He slept with a Gryffindor! He was mortified. He looked over and froze. A boy was sleeping next to him. He had short raven colored hair that looked tousled. He had glasses on his nightstand and that made Severus's breathing stop. He knew only one Gryffindor who fit that description. He tried to slip out of bed but couldn't make it. An arm wrapped around his waist. It pulled him close so that his back was against the man's chest and that the man's chin was rested on his head.

"Good morning Sev." The person mumbled. Severus was terrified. He turned to the person and looked at him. The face of James Potter was staring straight at him. He whimpered out and James chuckled. James pressed his lips on Severus's and pushed his tongue inside of his mouth. Severus pushed James's shoulder which was misinterpreted as a sign to continue. The kiss deepened and Sev was becoming desperate to make it stop. He bit down on James's tongue who yelped and pulled away quickly. He gave Severus a confused look but before he could speak Severus was up and dressed and practically running out of Gryffindor tower to the Slytherin dorms.

Severus would have thought that after his summer occupation nothing of the sexual nature would be embarrassing to him. Then again he never expected to wake up next to the boy who made his life a living hell every day. When he made it to the dungeon he threw himself on the bed to think. He had gotten drunk at a Slytherin party yesterday and had been dancing and that was probably the time he had shacked up with James because he can't remember anything after that. What shocked him was how James had been so happy to see him that morning. Now that he thought about it James had been nicer to him in the weeks before. He sighed and remembered everyone, except Sirius, had been nicer after he came back. James had been smiling at him every time they caught each other's glance. It was annoying at first but he had grown to ignore it. Apparently James had been lusting after hi , he shuddered to think about it, since his looks improved. He checked the time and panicked. He was supposed to meet Charles in the Room of Requirement an hour ago. He jumped out of bed and threw on some clothes. He quickly ran a finger threw his hair and ran out the Slytherin dorms and into the hallway.

When he made it into the room he was greeted with an onslaught of kisses. Severus was startled a bit but relaxed when Charles ran his fingers threw his hair. He was pushed down on a bed where Charles kissed up and down his throat. Sev let out a low moan and a contented sigh. He wrapped his arms around Charles's neck and his legs around his waist. Charles pressed his body closer to Severus and nipped at his collarbone. Sev felt his shirt slip of his shoulders and his pants slide down his legs. He moaned and wriggled in pleasure. Charles stops to look at him for a minute. Sev pouted and arched his back. Charles groaned and kissed him on his lips.

"Severus where were you?" Charles asked. Sev stayed quiet for a couple of seconds. He didn't want to lie to him but he was also scarred of his reaction. He kissed Charles below the ear and spoke.

"There was a Slytherin party last night and," he paused for a minute, "and I got drunk. I woke up this morning in someone else's bed. But I really didn't mean I and I had no clue what was going on…" He stopped to look up at Charles. Charles laughed and threw back his head. Severus tensed up.

"I already knew babe," he said.

"What?"

"I already knew. I heard from a friend that you went away with James you little slut." Charles's voice held so much malice. Sev tried to free himself from his grasp but to no avail. "Scream you bitch." And with that Charles thrust inside of Severus.

Sev wasn't sure what was happening. All he heard was his own screams and Charles's grunts from above him. Every now and then he'd feel the pain and scream for Charles to stop. He never did. Finally Charles released with a load moan and shudder. He pulled out and picked Severus up and opened the door of the room and threw him out on the floor. Severus banged on the door once it closed. He was ashamed he did it. He wanted Charles to open the door to take him back and hold him and say he was sorry. He banged louder and screamed. His legs where dripping with blood and semen but he didn't care. He banged harder and screamed louder until he grew hoarse. He became exhausted and finally stopped to fall down in a heap. He leaned up against the wall and passed out to the noise of someone calling his name.

If fate where kind to Severus James wouldn't have been the one to find him, but he did and carried Severus to the infirmary. Madame Pomfrey had been appalled by the state she had seen Severus in. She sent a chilling glare to James as he put Severus on one of the beds and he waved his arms defensively. He told her what he knew and she only nodded and continued to glare. She checked over Sev and did an array of healing spells and charms so to heal his injuries. She was deep in thought and her brows were furrowed together. Severus gave a low grunt as he felt something hurt "down there". He panicked and squirmed only to have James hold his shoulders down. Severus clamped his hand down on James's and cried silently. Madame Pomfrey finished and went into the closet to receive potions. James kissed Severus and wrapped his arms around his neck and shoulders.

"James," Severus whispered fluttering his eyes and drifting off into sleep.

* * *

If fate where kind to Severus he wouldn't have picked that day to piss of Sirius. He had just gotten in a fight with Remus, had gotten a detention, and had been suspended from quiddicth for an undetermined amount of time. So as he watched Sirius storm down the hall with poor little Peter in tow he should have know to pick a better day to assert himself as Sirius bumped into him knocking all of his books down. Narcissa bent down to help him and was about to say some choice words to her cousin before Severus got up to yell.

"BLACK!" he yelled out in fury. Sirius turned around and sneered.

"What do you want Snivellus?" The name had so much contempt that even Narcissa winced a bit. Severus choose to ignore the name.

"I've had it up to here with your bull shit!" Severus raised his hand above his head for emphases. "Now you apologize or they'll be hell to pay!" Sirius barked a cruel laugh (hahaha…dog).

"And what are you gonna do Snivellus? Grease up the floor with your hair and make me fall down?"

"No. I'm gonna take you on." Sirius pulled out his wand and shot a curse at Severus. He barely missed it and took out his own.

"EXPELIARMUS!" Severus shouted pointing his wand at Black. Sirius flew across the hall and landed with a loud thoud. He slowly got up and glared. He was fuming and his magic was flaring. He pointed his wand at Severus and sent off 3 different curses in quick precession hitting Severus. Sev fell to the ground and coughed droplets of blood. He scrambled back when he saw Sirius approaching. Narcissa threw herself in front of him only to be pushed roughly out of the way. Sirius picked up Severus and threw him roughly against the wall. Blood flew out of his mouth again and landed on his lips and a few droops on Sirius's fist which held him close to the wall. Sirius smirked in triumph and revved his arm back and his fist connected harshly to Severu's stomach. Severus slumped to the ground and rolled over. His hair covered his face as the tears poured out. He retched and then heaved up his breakfast and a large amount of blood. He passed out noticing the dim outline of shiny shoes rushing towards him.

James tapped his foot impatiently outside the Nurse. Remus was silent, even for him, Narcissa was crying silently while Lucius comforted her, Peter was fiddling with the sleeves of his robes, and Sirius, well he wore that shit-eat grin he was known for. Madame Pomfrey came out of the room with a sigh. Dumbledore wore a harsh expression and glared daggers a Sirius who fidgeted in his seat. Narcissa gave Madame Pomfrey a pleading look and asked if he was okay.

"I wish I could. He's stable and everything but…" She wondered off and looked down.

"What?" Narcissa asked. I had never seen her so wide-eyed before.

"Due to the nature of the hexes and the places they hit… Severus…" She paused and looked at Narcissa who looked like her puppy had just been hit by car and the driver backed up again. "Severus won't…considering how his body adjusted to being…submissive…" she made an awkward pause but continued on, "he won't be able to have children." Narcissa gaped at her and looked up at Lucius hoping that by some miracle he could do something but was met with a pair of closed eyes and pursed lips.

"What do you mean adjusted?" Peter asked innocently.

"When a male is the submissive in the relationship after a while his body adapts and he has the ability to give birth. That also means that his…seed won't be able to fertilize anyone. They…"

"Shoot blanks." Peter responded innocently. It was hard to believe that were possible but he pulled it off. Dumbledore gave an awkward cough and Madame Pomfrey nodded. Sirius, who had been silent, gave a chuckle. Everyone turned to him to see him shaking with laughter. It finally became full blown.

"Who'd lie with Severus anyway! Even if there was someone so desperate we sparred them the horror of having such a grotesque child!" Sirius laughed on. Remus shook with rage and Lucius was ready to throttle him. But before they could , and before Dumbledore could yell, James punched Sirius squarely across the cheek. He stumbled back and caught his balance on the wall. He put his hand to his reddened cheek and looked at James dumbly.

"You insensitive bastard! I can't believe you! I knew you were an ass hole but this takes the cake! Don't you think he's hurting?! DON'T YOU?!" He stopped and started up again " Of course not. Because your Sirius Fucking Black. He only thinks of himself. I mean who cares about other peoples pain. I'm all about me!" Everyone was gawking at James's red face but he continued.

"Don't you think someone loves him?! Well surprise, surprise Sirius because I DO! I love him and you hurt him! GOD YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH I WANT TO KILL YOU RIGHT NOW! I WANTED TO MARRY HIM, START A _FAMILY _ WITH HIM AND WE CAN'T BECAUSE REMUS GOT PISSED OFF AT YOU AND YOU DECIDED TO TAKE YOUR ANGER OUT ON THE WORLD!" James took in a sharp breath.

"Your overreacting. It was an accident!" Sirius whimpered out.

"OVERREACTING?!" James yelled in fury. Remus held him back and whispered in his ear to calm him down. James panted out and glared at Sirius. "What if it were Remus…Wouldn't you be angry?" James said meekly. Sirius thought about saying how he and Remus switched places and that wouldn't be that big of a problem but stopped. He got the just of what James was saying. He nodded his head in shame. James turned around and went inside to room to see Severus. Remus walked over to him and glared. Sirius reached out to take his hand but he pulled away harshly. Dumbledore put his hand on Sirius's shoulder and ushered him to his office.

Severus was curled up in a ball in the bed with the sheets drawn over his head. He whimpered and sniffled and buried himself further into their depths. He felt a hand stroke his shoulder and jerked away.

"Leave me alone." He muttered. The hand pulled back the covers and wrapped their arms around him. He pounded his fist against the toned chest only to feel the arms tighten.

"Shh baby. It's okay." James put his head on top of Severus's head.

"It's not. I feel empty."

"You shouldn't."

"I feel useless and incomplete."

"Your perfect and talented and have..." He was cut off.

"I didn't ask for your imput. Look James… I wanna break up."

"What?"

"I don't…I just…I'm not up for this now. I lost so much of myself being with you. I can't do it. I need my friends support and I just don't…need you being over me all the time. I think it's time for me to…" he stopped. The tears were pouring like fountains. James looked down at the beautiful face. He kissed Severus's lips. He got kneed in the groin right afterwords.

"I hate you… I hate you and your friends. You and those bloody fools made my life a living hell for the last few years of my life. This is just enough. I don't want anything to do with any of you." He glared at James.

"Sev…"

"Get out. GET OUT!" He shrieked. James walked out but turned and gave him a sad expression. Severus threw his head under the sheets and cried silently. James walked out of the room crying.

* * *

If fate were kind to Severus, James and he would have gotten back together. But it wasn't. And in Severus's short life he realized this fact all too soon. James and Lily became the perfect couple like everyone expected. Remus and Sirius were on eggshells with each other but they were getting along better since the accident. Narcissa was still refusing to talk to him but he knew that wouldn't last long. The tow had to attend a Black family function and with no one to talk to that would soon be history. After Hogwarts the Lucius married Narcissa and much to his chagrin so did Lily and James. The two had the perfect wedding to go along with their perfect life. Lucius and Narcissa weren't talking when Lucuis got himself in with Voldemort and of course took Severus along for the ride. One night after a terrible night with the Death Eaters he threw himself down on the couch in his living room and fell asleep. The feeling of someone shaking him awake woke him up. He shoot up abruptly but the man held him down and kissed him. He relaxed once he realized it was James who broke the kiss to carry Severus upstairs to his room. The two made love and fell asleep in a mass.

James and Severus continued their affair even after Lily gave birth to her and James's son. Severus would always ask James if it was really right for them to be doing this but only got a silencing kiss as an answer. James had promised that he was going to leave Lily but Severus doubted as much. James however really meant it and had left Severus's house one faithful night with that very intention. When he made it home he was greeted by an impatient Lily who assaulted him with kisses. He sat her down on the couch and told her he needed to talk but well…there was a sound at the door and you all know the rest.

If fate were kind to Severus he wouldn't have been sitting at his desk in his first-year potion class looking at the boy in front of him. He wasn't supposed to exist. The boy with his first crush's eyes and the love of his life's features. If fate were kind he wouldn't be here in this class with a glamour on to give him his repulsive appearance. Or if he were he'd be his beautiful full-lipped and wavy-haired self and the boy would be his own son. With pale skin brown or onyx eyes and dark raven hair. Not the tanned-skinned, green-eyed, scar-head boy he saw before him. He scowled and looked down at his papers. He whimpered lowly and almost teared up but remembered where he was. He wasn't going to hate the boy, give him a hard time sure but not hate him. He's protect him for three reasons. One was to remember when he was innocent and in love with his friend, two as a memory of her and the one he loved…loves even now, and the third…to remind him of how fate wasn't kind. How it was a cruel thing that loved to make him miserable in any and every way. He smiled cruelly. The boy looked up at the man and gawked. He glared daggers and snarled. His glamour must have slipped up considering the way the boy blushed and stared. He stared out the window and saw a butterfly fluttering against the window. It kept tapping on the glass slowing moving towards the dark corner of the window sill. The butterfly began twitching violently trying to get itself out of the web. Severus could almost hear its tiny screams of "Help me, help me, help *gurgle of some sort*" until the spider bit it harshly. Severus smiled a little sad smile. That butterfly fluttering helplessly and dumbly into the window it got caught in the web was him. He made stupid mistakes and was caught in a web and would be until he died painfully. He chuckled lowly and darkly again. If fate were kind to Severus, he wouldn't have been right. If fate were so kind.

* * *

WOW MY GOD! I totally ended this somewhat differently than I imagined…sigh. Well I guess it all turned out. So I'm depressed cuz my iPod got stolen when my anemia was bad and I like passed out and went to the nurse leaving my purse in the room. Yeah…I want that asshole to get hit by a bus. Anyway I need to work on my other fic. I Hope you enjoyed.


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